Independence month 3

The loneliness is killing me...

Indeed my housemate is a good housemate but I need to expand my circle of friends. How lar in this pandemic? Can't even make friends with the neighborhood hawker haha

Well, the only other place I visited the most is the wet market. I 'kena saman' (received traffic summon) parking on the roadside blocking the shop. I should've listen to my housemate parking into the next car slot that probably block the shop but not on the road with yellow stripes. My bad. my bad.

I broke a sewing tool and I feel like going out and visit the wet market tomorrow morning just to get a breather. I'm stuck in the mental loop of work stress due to issues and tasks on hand. Well, all these going on is not helpful at all for my well being. Not only I put on weight, I'm not working hard enough for my mental health as well as diabetes control.

I feel damned. Why am I in this mess again? Why? Struggling to cope with the stressors in life, not easy. But I need to believe that I'm on the right track resisting the temptations to give up / give in. It's easy to give in, surrender but all that does is imprisonment. I'll be imprisoned by whatever I give in to... Like food, negative thoughts etc.

3rd month into my independence, am I doing good? I'm at least aware about myself, my belongings, my stuff, my good and bad, my stressors, my likings, my control and uncontrolled areas, my highs and lows, my needs and wants, ...

Hope keeps one alive. I just need to find more people to stay alive together. Keyword -- together. Not alone.