Guest Book

As the flowers grow, the grass also.
As our friendship grows, our bond also.

Tell me more about you here.
Tell me what you want to say to me.

Wanna know me? Leave me a message.

Invite me for food as I love them.
Invite you for food as I love you too.

Welcome to My Diary~
My Garden of Emotions in words.

What's wrong with me?

I'm not sure what's wrong with me recently.

Got a little bit depress, a little bit of distract, a little bit of not knowing what is right and what is wrong.

Not knowing why am I still alive and living like a trash!!!

 

I pissed people, I hurt people and I damage people.

There is one thing I don't do is to love people.

 

I have lost my love sight.

 

I lost my sense of love. I'm upset.

 

the big word I wanna shout is~~
LEAVE ME ALONE!!!

 

Now I think the same old question is still pondering:"What's wrong with me?"

 

What should I say to make people feel better? What should I say to myself(people) to make me(others) feel better?

 

Am I not human? Don't crush me with the trash. I deserve a human treatment.

 

Sorry if I pissed you off reading this stupid passage. I'm not going to make any good here. I'm even pissed off with myself!!!

 

Is this a sign of depression or I'm just too stressed out?

Before I start to study...

Before I start to study for my mid-term exams, I visited my msn space. I found that there's a friend who posted quite a number of comments but I didn't notice it until today. I finished reading the comments and was sparked to say something here.

I really would like to share CHRIST with others. To understand Christian is difficult but to understand CHRIST is easy because there is only one CHRIST and there are millions of Christians. hahaha....

Well, I watched a "The Miracle Box" which is a movie by famous Hong Kong artist Choi Siu Fen. I like the whole movie, the songs, the characters. At last I found out that it was a story about a doctor (Choi Siu Fen) who dedicated herself during the SARS decease in Hong Kong. She died after the incident. She also lost her husband from Leukimia(hope I'm not wrong in the spelling). The husband actually was the one who introduced the "box". Why is the box miracle? It was because the box has "magical power"...

Of course, no. The box does not possess any magical power but there is a Mighty God up above in the Heaven who does. The box was given to those who looks sad and has a lot of trouble in life. All the troubles just let it out and put it in the box and The Heavenly God Father will help you to take care of it. As Choi Siu Fen also testify in her own words that God is the provider in her life.

I was so touched. I was touched by God immediately. I know He Loves me all the time no matter I'm good or bad, happy or sad. I just wanna say sorry to my Father that I let Him down often by drawing myself away from Him. How I hope I can always consciously felt His Touch on me.

Blessing everyday but I did not manage to collect them. My Heavenly Father always take care of me but I still complain that life is not good enough. Thousands of raindrops fell like blessing of the Father giving me the new breath, new life, new vision to live my life.

However, I was thinking why am I here on Earth? Why am I here for? What is my purpose in life? Why do I need to study hard and work hard and still thinks that I do not have enough in life? Why do I need to control my diet to make sure I'm healthy?(This I know la... cos our body is God's house, so have to take care).

So many questions... I'm been through quite a lot of emotional breakdown until I think I do not have the courage to share my love with others anymore. I started to pretend... Only in front of certain friends I'm the real me... I would be able to express... Even my some what good friend has becoming a stranger to me... I started to become quick temper... I'm going to lose my love ones...

I need God. I need His Love, pouring down to once again fill me up. My Jesus, I need you. Now and now!
I would question why I can't feel His Existence but I still know He exists everywhere anytime. So I'm somehow blocked...

Argh~~~~~ I wanna shout all my burdens to Him, like the box, He will take care of all my business for me.
Actually He blessed me throughout my studies. I've got such a good result due to His Love. He promised to give me good life if I obey Him. He protected me from the day I repented. He took care of me until now and I know He will continue to "sayang" me until the end of my life even til eternity.

So before I start my study, I will pray. I will ask God to help me, which this is always going to help me to calm myself and start with a clear mind to study better and more efficient. God is no bluff, He will take care of all the business because He is God.

So tell you problem, "Hey problem, I have a BIG GOD here!" hehe... I do not fear problems because I have Faith -- it makes me sure of what I hope for and gives me PROOF of what I cannot See.

End of my sharing. Back to study~

《再见萤火虫》

"哥，再见。"

最后一句再见~
最后一次睁开眼~
最后一口气~
最后一块西瓜~
最后一次痛苦~
最后一眼看世界~
最后一次发光~

最后的最后，哥哥和她相见，带领着她，保护着她，让她依偎着睡着了……

"No See No Split"?

A group of us went out yesterday night to celebrate Hui Li's birthday...

What has it to do with "See and Split"? haha... actually we went to a restaurant named "不见不散" that's why lo...

Well, actually we see and then split lo... that's why:
Applied Expert System Rule System:
Rule: "No See No Split"
Fired Rule: Since we know that "No See No Split" is true then we can conclude that "See and Split" is true
akaka...

Want more? The restaurant is named "Shall We Meet" in english...
So apply the rule again, "We Shall Not Meet To Avoid Split"... hohoho...

Many a times we meet some where, forget about our burdens, we chat for the whole day BUT at the end of the day, we still split due to our responsibilities. So my friend, appreciate what is in front of you. Time flees, we grow old and die. The time we have together is only from the day we meet until death split us apart. How I hope we can have a lifetime to be friends.

~Friends Forever~

The only way to be forever is to believe there is forever. I believe, because Christians do believe eternity life. But whether we can be together in Heaven is still a question because not all my friends believe what I believe.

Nonetheless, I will continue to value the time we have together. If they do one day have faith in what I believe then we will meet again in Heaven despite the hardships on earth.

\(^_^)/ Love all of you~ Take care.

《第一次》 光良

快一个星期了~


第一次，连续两天赶报告，忙碌让我喘不过气。第一次，发现报告超难写，因为手上没资料、头脑一片空白。
第一次，有人说我的部落格太多字，可是是心情无法一语道破。
第一次，以上的朋友开始部落格。很精简，很多人会喜欢，我也阅读。
第一次，因为考试考不好很想哭。
第一次，因为考得太糟心情不好。
第一次，早睡却无法早起，因为太累了~
第一次，离开我的心这么久，所以才没写部落格。
第一次，雯毕业后从槟城来PJ，放下课业去会面。
第一次，有很强烈的欲望却勇敢地打消它。
第一次，宿舍要办免费的世界杯庆典，发出了印有姓名的请柬。
第一次，求弟弟帮我打印文件。
第一次，不回家。
第一次，去琳的家过夜。
第一次，想去图书馆。
第一次，想陪飞去漫画馆。
第一次，朋友有难却无能。
第一次，什么都在我控制范围以外。
第一次，整夜抱着吉他，弹弹唱唱不嫌累。
第一次，拼命下载歌曲。（居然有150首之多）
第一次，发现自己没了爱情的感觉。
第一次，只想身边的人都是朋友。
第一次，看到以前会让我心动的人而无法悸动。
第一次，在别人家过夜好像盗贼一样不放心。

一个星期，一堆的第一次。

我想，部落格是感情的橱窗，为自己透气的窗口，这也是我为什么花很多时间看别人写的东西，就为了了解他们，有些东西三言两语不可能说得完。

想你，想从前，想看电影，想打球，想游泳，想想~

懒洋洋的我……

最近懒懒的……


图源：MSN大頭～懶

[转贴]世上最伟大-- 爱的真谛

恋爱的时候，我们享受爱，而真懂得爱却是从作母亲开始的。
　　
虽然许多女人惊心动魄地描述过产痛，可是却有更多的女人安详地，带着凯旋的心情去迎接它。哦，那简直是一场生命降生的圣战呢，出征的时候，母亲张开了希望的帆，虽有狂风呼啸而来，母亲喘息着、挣扎着，拼死也不放弃她的船。许多时候，帆会被风扯碎，可怜的母亲会象一片被打碎的舢板在狂风巨浪中被抛来抛去 --那痛楚和黑暗是何等的大呵，甚至，母亲会忘记了那时刻的意义，她只盼望那时刻的过去，哪怕以死交换！ 　

我从来不会想到迎接一个新生命的诞生原来必须经过如此黑暗的前奏--母亲必须孤独地带着伤、流着血趟过死河。但爱就是这样开始的，爱必须负伤流血趟过死河才知道自己是否有力量去拥抱生命。 　　

所以，上帝没有让女人在葡萄树下像摘果子一样摘下一个孩子。上帝让女人走过死荫地，正如让他的儿子走过各各他。 　　

上帝只把生命交托在入死出生的爱里。 　　

那么，你如何诠释这爱呢？ 　　

爱毋需诠释。 　　

爱是付出？是分享？爱除了爱以外再也没有更好的解释了。当你试图解释爱的时候，你解释的是文字，抓住的是道理，而爱却不在其中。 　　

爱是完整的。它的完整性就在于它肯把生命掰开来分享出去。不单如此，爱还可以揉碎了喂养生命，而它的每一个碎屑都是一个完整的爱的晶体--这晶体携带了爱的全部定义。 　　

爱是丰富的，当它付出的时候，它就增多，付出愈多，爱就愈多，当爱源源不断地倾倒出去的时候，爱的杯就斟满了。 　　
爱是一种恩赐。没有一个女人可以泅渡到生命河里捞一把泥土来造一个孩子，她只能到上帝面前领取。爱亦如此。若我们能爱，那不是我们的造化，乃是上帝的恩宠。哦，对此我再找不到比黎巴嫩诗人纪伯伦更好的表达了："当你爱的时候，你不要说'上帝在我心中'，却要说'我在上帝的心里'。不要想你引导爱的路程，因为若是它觉得你配，它就引导你。" 　　

爱不总是一种方式。 　　

爱可以愤怒，却不积怨。爱会受伤却不自怜。爱有时唠叨，但沉默时表达得更多。当然，爱也需要走出心灵的深宫，就像水需要走出大海。爱若总是隐藏着、收敛着、沉淀着，日久天长，那儿就变成了死海，再没有鱼儿漫游间，连鸟儿都不从它的上空飞过，而地也干涸了。 　　

爱毋需回报，却要求回应。爱提供了自己，正如花儿提供了春天。它所要求的全部回应就是享受它。 　　

爱是尊贵的，却可能衣衫褴褛。爱是自足的，却可能向卑微者求乞。哦，我怎样描述这种不可思议的爱呢？我找遍了世界的经典，最后只找到一个例证--那就是上帝的儿子耶稣基督的生命。 　　

万有都是他的，可他却降生在马槽里。不但如此，他还选择了终生贫穷--狐狸有洞，天上的飞鸟有窝，而他却没有放枕头的地方！ 　　

哦，不要试图用人间的理性去诠释这爱吧！ 　　

爱不接受分析。你愈分析就离爱愈远。 　　

万王之王的儿子衣裳褴褛地进入人群，这就是爱了！若不如此，人群中最卑微的那个怎么能够作他的朋友？ 　

　

哦，我实在不能略过人类历史上一次最伟大的求乞--那是公元一世纪的一个正午，在撒马利亚的雅各井旁，万王之王的儿子竟然向一个卑微的撒马利亚女人要水喝！ 　　

那是一个犯罪的女人。她不敢在清晨或傍晚凉爽的时辰出门，烈日炎炎的正午，街上没有行人，她来到井边打水。万王之王的儿子却早已等候在井边，他对她说：

"请你给我水喝。" 　　

这是何等不可思议的事情！全世界的江河湖泊都属他，他却向一个被世界唾弃的女人求水！哦，这就是爱了，若不这样，那女人怎么能够认识他！ 　　

就在那口井边，他以求乞开始，却把生命的活水赐给了那个女人。 　　

当尊贵向卑微求乞的时候，它就把自己给了卑微，并且，让卑微尊贵地接受它。 　　

哦，我仿佛看到了泰戈尔笔下那乘华丽的车辇—— 　　

万王之王来了，他的车辇停在一个乞丐的面前，那乞丐是何等的惊喜呵，他觉得他的运气来了，苦难就要结束了。他站着等候，等候王一掷千金的施与。王微笑着下了车，走到乞丐的施与。王微笑着下了车，走到乞丐的面前，忽然伸出手来，说："你有什么给我呢？"乞丐糊涂了，犹豫地站着，最后从口袋里摸出一粒最小的玉米献给王。 　　

晚上回到家里，乞丐把口袋倒在地上的时候，在讨乞的粗劣东西中发现了一粒金子。乞丐痛哭了，恨自己没有慷慨地将他所有的给王。 　　

爱就是这样不按逻辑演绎！ 　　

爱是一种力量，却柔弱如水。 　　

爱不自卫，却永远得胜。 　　

当然，爱会受伤，如果伤害不能使爱减损，那么，伤痕就是爱的最佳冠冕，因为惟有爱配得。 　　

爱是一种生命，却在死亡中诞生。 　　

哦，哪里会有这样的爱呢？ 　　

让我们回到各各他去寻找那古旧的十字架吧！那上面有关乎爱的全部答案： 　　

万王之王的儿子曾经戴着荆棘的冠冕走完了人间最后一段爱的旅程--他负着伤、流着血，孤独地趟过死河。在十字架上，当铁钉带着世界的诅咒穿透他的掌心的时候，永生就在死亡的地平线上喷薄！ 　　

托起那太阳的是爱的海，那海里流动的是他的血…… 　　

哦，这就是爱了。 　　

除了他，我再找不到爱的全部定义。 　　

告别的黄昏，爱给世界留下了微柔的宣言--那就是他在十字架上轻轻吐出的最后一句话："成了！"

受伤了。

我受伤了，体无完肤。爱是无法诠释的却也像水一样，既能载舟又能覆舟。受伤并不是因为别人上到了我，而是自己脚踩陷阱又怎么能不跌下去呢？

最近对爱有个新的认识，原来它无法用任何语言、文字、或者作品来表达，它就是爱本身。然而我一直都以为是可以用某些行动或者方法来表示，原来我想太多了。呵呵呵……

我不喜欢的事物，喜欢的东西，都不是我的，因为是上帝让我在他里面享受了爱的权利。

受伤的我，是自己傻傻地以为自己很懂得爱。原来我们都不知道爱直到我们为人父母的那一天。

因为受伤让我胆却不敢前进。结果，我决定不要再觉得谈恋爱是必经之路，而放宽心，让我在天父的手心里享受他给我的关怀和爱人的自由。

爱让人承载也让人受伤害。因为我们不会爱却"识少少，扮代表"结果受伤了要找人顶罪。

唯有天父的爱，让我受关怀也分享爱。我自己没有爱因为爱从神而来。

我果然是空手而来满载而归，因为完成了主工，我今生无悔。

到目前都还没有开始定性为主奋勇过生活，糜烂的日子我已经厌倦。曾经说要改变却只看到沉淀。

受伤了要爬起来，知道了要能改过，错过了要学会珍惜，付出了不要求回报，尝过了要时时守着，有一天回天家，你会看见堆积如山的财宝是主在世上锻炼你的成果。

突然领悟，即在天上的财宝并不是金，也不是银，而是主所给你人生宝贵的经验和独特的经历。

世上不会有两个burning bush（摩西--埃及王子在旷野遇到神的经历）的经历，也不会有两次洪水淹没大地的奇迹，所以你我独特，爱我得神爱你，爱你的我是神的爱从我流露出来因为我没有爱，只会伤害。

自己受伤了就知道跌跤是会痛的。从来不摔倒就不能从失败中学习。

你说我这次可以攀得更高吗？: )
希望在人间，有爱在神身边，财宝在你面前，站起来你就领回去！

站起来！站起来！
"起来，起来 起来 起来……"

呵呵呵……原来失败重来可以更潇洒。

祝福每个人得到那真正的爱！

压抑

压抑的是心情，压抑的是感情。

很害怕把自己真实的一面表露出来，装疯卖傻只为了让大家来接受一个比较合乎社会ｔｏｎｅ调的我。

假装已经是武装，一种融入社会圈子的工具。我的面具只有黑夜看不见。我的心跳只有天空听得到。我的一切只有入夜才有生命。

我的部落格没有人看，我的生活没有人管，我的感情没有人懂，我的世界没有人陪。

为什么我就必须利用部落格来抒发？

介绍３首歌－－范逸臣《Ｌｏｖｅ　Ｓｔｏｒｙ》，　蔡依林《假装》，　陈奕《傻瓜》，　

我像风吹过之后落叶的飘洒，直到树上不再存留，直到遍地有痕迹。

你会在乎吗？有人会在乎吗？

为了"流芳百世"，为了名利地位，为了家财万贯，我们什么事做不出？为了爱情，我们更是不择手段！

压抑的我，压抑的你，压抑的我和你～

Sadness

I think many a times I smile, I laugh but I don't mean it. I did that all because the people wants to see it. I did it on purpose.

I found an author who is a Taiwanist wrote the book "Winnie (the pooh), don't cry". I don't know why such a guy will have so much of emotions. He cried because his girlfriend left him. He is a collector of Winnie the Pooh and his first Winnie was a present from his girlfriend. Until now, still the one and only first love. He used 6 yrs to be with this girl and 7 yrs to recover from the sadness of losing her.

That leads to me... I have discover many good friends along the way in life but I did not really appreciate them well enough. I still remember I have a friend whom I'd like very much, I gave her my first necklace which cost me about 80% of my monthly allowance. I bought it for myself but when she said she likes it, I gave it to her. However, that was not what she wants and my neck is always empty until now. I received 2 necklace as my birthday present but I lost them. I think that was because they disappear like the first one...

I don't know, just don't understand why can't I like what likes me rather than to love those who do not love me. I'm really a fool. Things that I like is sometimes quite odd but too be a normal one, I tried to be like others who are easily accepted in general. I lost my dreams, I lost my passion, I lost all the love I should have along the way.

I'm not the me I want to be. I'm not being myself, I'm feeling very sad... sad... sad...

Love is like a drug, it can either cure you or hurt you.

Only when you're at that level, you'll feel the pain that someone felt, you'll know the sadness that the person felt. When was the last time you face a person/ a friend with the real you? Me? Never...

Just like a normal tough girl, I will never cry in front of others... even I do that is because I try to be like a normal one but that is not me. That is not the me that I will do. I smile to be polite, I smile to try to be friendly because that is descent and socially acceptable. If I cry, I'm weak, I'm not grown up.

That's why I hate the world of the adults. Everyone is pretending, every face has a.. no, it's several masks on top of it. The masks will never be removed until the day they die. Come on, who can just let me be so comfortable and reveal the real self?

Sick

You know what, I like to be sick sometimes... When I'm sick, the people around me will simply control me and that makes me feel secure that they are aware of my existence. How sad it is to be like that actually...

I have a very good guy friend, everytime I'm sick he'll try to buy me medicine although I told him it is not necessary. Like the last time, I finish a whole bottle of "Pei Pa Gou" because he bought one for me. This time I caught cold, running nose and block sometimes. He said he wanted to buy me an inhaler but I insisted no need. So, he withdrawed after a few attempts of trying to persuade me to buy one. I am glad to have such a friend.

In my life, I have quite a number of angels (very good friends) who never hesistate to show their concern and love. As a friend I really appreciate and value all the small little things that they did to me. I remember every little things that each and everyone of my friends did to me to show that they care about me.

There was once, I was given an amount of money as a birthday present but not allowed to use it without their control. The story was they spend me for breakfast, lunch and dinner everyday within their budget. So to say, help me to keep fit wor... but I actually disappoint them as not becoming slim hahaha...

Well, all these little little memory will become my valuables in the future like now. What they have contributed to my life is not what money can buy. It is not something that we can grab but it is something that we can store or capture using our "natural camera" to snap into our memory. You may think I may not remember them everyday but when I'm in need, that's where the memories come to rescue.

Hahaha... today I also bought a new bottle of shampoo -- Anti-dandruff Head and Shoulder. I hope it does not make my head feel itchy again...

Recently, I get bored playing computer. Everytime I open my laptop, I felt sleepy... A computer addict is going to become computer phobia...

Headache again... because of the long expose to my laptop I think. Quite a serious problem... This week I may need to go back to Klang earlier to get my dental check up. Long time didn't go for check up... I wonder my single fraud tooth still in good condition or I should do something else on it. Hopefully not money involve again...

Sickness make me dizzy, sickness make me sleepy;
Flower makes me happy but people makes me even exited.

I think I'm falling in love with all the people around me. I am satisfy with all the people around me but the one and only thing I wanted to do is to help them to know more about Christ and at the end of our worldly life, we can still be together eternally in Heaven.

Miss God so much, He didn't call me or rather I didn't answer His calls. I should've responded accordingly but I didn't. I no good girl but I will try to be one!

I love all my friends. I love because God first Loves me. He is my source of Love and Power.

May God heal me with His mighty hands and wonderous Love.

I'm very happy [english version of 我很高兴]

I'm very happy. My friend told me that she likes me. She likes me not because I'm good or not because I'm good to her. My first impression to her - hurting comment. Indirectly hurt her in a way but that's where our friendship started.

I was surprised that friendship is not build upon my very strong giving but it is just a relationship.

We always support each other, we always help each other.

I just wanna tell all my S3SLove 2001 classmates, I love all of you.

My life is painted with colour because of all of you. You are my memory, my companion and my love ones.

My life is lighten up with all of your love. Will never forget you.

Love ya~

我很高兴

我很高兴。很高兴有人喜欢我。有朋友告诉我她很喜欢我。我一直以为我必须很用力、很用心才能获得别人的喜爱，原来不然。

朋友就是真挚的感情交流。原来我们的火花并不是一开始就用温柔来对待对方。她对我的印象是一针见血的意见，不留心的回应居然给她留下了深刻的印象。朋友就这样开始了。

我原来一直不知道朋友可以这么单纯。

我也想告诉所有高三理爱2001的同学，我喜欢你们。你们就是我的回忆，就是我孤单时的陪伴，是我夜深人静的思念。不善言辞、不善表达却是很用心去培养对你们单纯的思念。不管大家散落在何方，我就是想说，我想念你~

很可爱的朋友们，身置两地却让风载着满满的思念互相联系。

爱你们！加油！生活中有你真幸福！

Sore feet

Walau~ painful standing with high-heels for 2 whole day!!!

But worthwhile with the photos of Pak Lah and the experience gained from The Inaugural Meeting of United Nations and Showcase of Malaysia ICT and Development.

This was a so long time ago event... later will do a photo album about it. Look forward o...hehehe

Air Crash Disaster - visitation of ministry of higher education

Oh ya, forgot to update everyone about an upcoming Global Alliance Showcase which will happen next Monday and a stupid airplane that crashes on my head the Monday before. This is so the big air crash because the dove and aeroplane crash at the same time [on the kite they missed]! This is so the stupid!

You know what happen? Don't know le... it is because the so called Director form the Ministry of Higher Education drove the aeroplane when he visited UTAR on Monday! He went to toilet half way driving and forgot to change the plane to auto-driving mode. So, well, you know what happen next, the plane crashed and we went home without presenting anything after waited for 3 hours like monkey [doing rehearsals].

This is too much! How come after we had been prepared for like about 3-5 days and at last because of the "air disaster" we were not appreciated! I even have to skip a tutorial class for it! Too much to pay such a high price. Next time they better make sure they are coming because I would not repeat the stupid monkey show again!

hehehe.... but I didn't want to attend tutorial as well because I don't really like to attend class, I like to learn from practical experience. If you tell me about a theory I would not understand but if you can show me or help me to carry out the theory I would remember it for life. That is how I live with the skills I acquired from young til now. Nothing is impossible, everything is possible!

I would like to try out this phrase next time round when I want to start a new adventure:
Instead of "Hey God, I have a BIG problem" I would say," Hey problem, I have a BIG God here!"
This will help me to progress to a higher level in life.

I would like to share a poem:

In Your Hands I am protected,
Under Your Wings I am safe,
Above the sky You bring me to;
Over the storm that I should never fear.

God is above me turning IMPOSSIBLE into POSSIBLE because He says "I-M-POSSIBLE"! So when we are stuck with problems think about I-M-POSSIBLE and you're one in a million that had possibly swum to the ovum and born into a human being that God Loves. You're one in a million or billion or trillion that He has chosen to become a human being! We are the champion at least for once in our life time [in case you don't recognise any] because we were competing to get to the ovum and become a human! hehehe

Come one, one air crash is going to stop me from progressing? NOPE! I will continue to pursue higher level, to reach the level of spreading my wings and soar above the storm!

The life of an Eagle is so adventurous yet the outcome or consequences is so great! Do you know what is the feeling of soaring above the storm? Follow Jesus Christ and He will lead you the way for He is the Light, the Way and the Truth!

What is an air crash when you're above the storm? You're looking at the crash from far above. Isn't that interesting and wonderful? Try it out, you'll never regret and you never will.

The influence of Alcohol

I just wanna write down about my experience with alcohol...

5 yrs ago, when I first went to Pulau Langkawi, I was still a bad bad girl who smokes. I quietly bought a packet of cigarette and smoked one of it but light up all the 20 sticks and put it at the balcony of the hotel we stayed. So bad huh, worse thing is coming along...
That night we actually bought a few bottles of wine or may be beer is more suitable, well however, they were alcoholic drinks. I drank 2 bottles in one shot and felt dizzy and really can't walk in a straight line. Then I took out a present which I wanted to give to a friend (I don't have courage to do it before the alcohol starts bubbling) and gave it out!!

Wow, first time I buy present to other people and present it in public... I was very shy that time.

But then, this time (few days ago) worse thing happen...
This time was Emotionally Uncontrollable Disaster. Well, I believe everyone has emotional crisis. But this time mine is definitely undesirable and unacceptable. You know we humans tend to look at things which is beautiful... I was with a younger girl at this Chinese Wedding Dinner... so happen, we were the two youngest ones, the others were... you know, uncles and aunties...
We started to drink red wine and Hennesy... that's where the alcohol started it's chemical reaction... my cheek became red and I felt hotter and hotter. The girl in front of me (she's sitting opposite) became more and more beautiful... I fond of her at that time.. walau eh, so disasterous!!! I was planning to tell her she's beautiful and ask her to go out with me to yum cha or whatever, and want to get her to be my friend... but.. but.. but I manage to "break" at the point before the words fell out of my mouth. Phew~ it was so close to the lips that I would accidently spilled out what is in my mind. One of the uncle were so bad (he's almost 100% drunk), he was there teasing an Indonesian maid of other people... asking her to eat "hotdog", asking her to go "karaoke", asking her to get drunk so that they can send her "back home"... wou...what a night full of alcohol...

Alcohol not a bad thing but not a good one either. So I have decided not to quit alcohol but to control my "input" of it to prevent the disaster from happening again~ what a blessed wedding dinner, I stop at the right point and now I know I can do it and I believe God is helping me!!

Ouch, that hurts when I stop myself from telling people how I feel because I think it is abnormal. But actually it is not abnormal, I should train myself to praise other people more often so that I won't feel embarrased when trying to praise other people again.

See how God works? NO? Look forward for the next post, I'll have more to update you~

Adios Amigos

First MileStone

I was awarded the excellent achiever award for the Industrial Training that I have gone through with Lion's Club of CyberCare Kuala Lumpur!

I want to thank Ms Hoo, Mr Tan, our Dean Dr Tan and my fellow team members, to list down:
Ms Wan Jing Ying
Mr Ang Yi Yang
Mr Chu Guang Yaw

EEP Team
Mr Kee Chuang Kok (PM)
Mr Law Chee Horng a.k.a Max
Mr Lee Han Boon
Ms Ooi Shiau Fei

I want to thank them for making SITA programme a success and help me in building my character. As the PM (Project Manager) for my VMS team, I would like to thank each and every member in the team because they really supported me and assist me in the project also being a good team player to reach the success of our system.

Well, I guess this is just the first step, which is the FIRST milestone I have achieve in my life. I would continue to build on proven formula and go on to pursue the next level until the end of my life in this world.

I want to Praise my Heavenly Father, who had protected me, given me knowledge, courage and wisdom to present!

Thank you Jesus Christ who has saved me before the world began and had teach me and carry me through all the milestone in my life.

Give thanks and praises unto God the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit who had bring me to realise that when I believe, he will build on my faith and continue to bless me with greater success in life and greater testimony to share with people.

I am proud to be a Christian who have faith and believe in Jesus Christ.

Love

Is love so hard? Is it so difficult?

When we said:"Can you please love me? I love you so much, why would you not love me?" to someone of human, we forgot that God is actually saying this to us as well.

Is there any thing we can do to love someone more than what we can?

又是一个爱的问题。

他说：“你不要爱上我，受伤的只是你自己”
另一个说：“只要你爱上我，我回不顾一切的爱你”

第一个是你爱的人，而第二个是爱你的人。那怎么办？爱你的人你不爱，不爱你的人你却偏爱……

爱很奇怪，该来的时候不来，不该来的时候来，教我怎么清楚这道理？

要不，你来说说看好了，看你可否给这问题下个定论。

(O_o)